Chapter Four: Yanyan's Daydream

After thanking the female manager, she left, her mind heavy with thoughts.

Outside, the sun shone brightly. The once-familiar photography studio and snack shop caught her eye. From the corner audio store, the most popular song of that year, "Pearl of the Orient," drifted out. There was the roadside garden that stretched all the way to the stadium, lush and green, exuding the scent she remembered so well. Tall poplar trees lined both sides of the road, evoking a sense of being transported to another world. All these beautiful things would, in a few years, be replaced by wide avenues. What luck it was to return and relive those golden years! And now that she was back, she was determined to make up for all the wasted time and lingering regrets. From today on, she would carefully plan her life—no more drifting like a pitiful wanderer, no more letting her child grow up lonely by her side, and no more watching her husband work himself to exhaustion for their sake. No! Xu Cheng, let's stop dragging each other down—I want a brand new love that has nothing to do with you! In her heart, Dong Yanyan shouted this resolve.

When she first got together with Xu Cheng, it was only because they leaned on each other at their lowest points. How much of it was love, even she couldn’t say. With no one to rely on, the days they struggled together held a few warm memories, but mostly there was helplessness and bitterness in a life of instability and hunger. She no longer wanted to waste her most beautiful years running around for mere survival. If not for this unexpected turn today, that road would have continued endlessly: she would remain a full-time mother with no prospects, while Xu Cheng would continue shuttling between work and home, living paycheck to paycheck, exhausted from being the buffer between her and his mother, stealing moments to help care for their daughter. From Lulu’s birth until yesterday, in four years, neither of them had slept through a single night.

But tonight—maybe tonight, she could finally have a good night’s sleep! Her heart began to leap with joy.

Crossing the street brought her to the school gate. Students trickled out of the cafeteria, holding their meal tins. On the small playground, a few boys played basketball, bathed in the gentle afternoon sun. Warmth enveloped Dong Yanyan, and those once-familiar faces returned. Just like fifteen years ago, she sat on the steps in front of the school building, watching the seniors play basketball, her thoughts drifting away:

In those four years, she had spent two years nursing a crush on a boy, and the next two dating Xu Cheng. Her grades hovered right in the middle—out of thirty students, she consistently ranked fourteenth or fifteenth, a pattern she maintained until graduation. It wasn’t until she walked enthusiastically out of the school gates that she realized how fierce the competition in society really was, and that she’d spent her best years on idle romance and sleeping in. With no work experience, the school no longer assigned jobs, and coupled with her petite frame, childish baby face, and the naïveté of a middle schooler, there was hardly an employer willing to hire her. Her search for a job was fraught with difficulties. In hindsight, she could hardly blame them—she really had been naïve to the point of foolishness. Who would hire a little girl who knew nothing of the world and could neither lift nor carry?

First, she needed to change her lazy habits. She hadn’t gone to high school but had enrolled directly in this technical secondary school due to her poor health. Not making it to university had always been her regret. She knew that in a few years, the national college entrance policy would change, allowing students from technical schools to take the college entrance exam. Many of her classmates had already taken corresponding majors in broadcasting and television to continue their studies, but she had followed Xu Cheng into the workforce early, dreaming of a life together. Dreams were beautiful, but reality was harsh.

She thought, why not apply to the Academy of Media? More years of study and broader horizons would surely be worthwhile. As for the tuition… her eyes drifted to the low wall by the playground. The school was in the city center, surrounded mostly by shantytowns except for a few other schools. In two years, Yatai Group would acquire this land, building high-rises along the Yitong River, kicking off the city’s housing reform. The local residents could not foresee such a future and did not believe in such good fortune, so at the current market price, a small house here cost only a few thousand yuan. Once demolition began, even a sixty-square-meter apartment in the city center would fetch at least a hundred thousand—more than enough for tuition, or even to open a small shop.

She was lost in dreams of sudden wealth when a basketball suddenly rolled to her feet. She picked it up and tossed it back to the boys, her eyes lighting up. “Brother Wang, it’s you!” she greeted him warmly. This senior, a final-year student, later became Xu Cheng’s colleague. After Xu Cheng started working, they were assigned to the same department and discovered they’d once attended the same school for a year, which naturally brought them closer. They often shared drinks, and she became well acquainted with him too.

Wang Yunpeng paused, then flashed her a smile. “Thanks, little sister!” He was still a bit puzzled—why did this new student act as if she knew him well?

Watching him retrieve the ball and make a beautiful move for a slam dunk, Dong Yanyan was struck by a sudden realization. She had wasted an immense network of personal connections. She and her peers were the first batch of junior high graduates admitted to this school on merit from ordinary families. Previously, the school had only recruited students from senior high, all of whom had family ties in the broadcasting system and often already held positions at the TV station. After two years here, they’d walk straight into a job. If she had befriended more of these seniors, they might have offered her valuable information without even realizing it.

More importantly, most of the teachers here also held positions within the broadcasting and television system—a fact Xu Cheng only discovered after starting work, realizing that many of his direct supervisors were former teachers. Those teachers remembered their hardworking students vividly, so even years later, they greeted them warmly. After teaching for over a decade, many of their students had returned to the TV station or become elite professionals in the electronics industry. Many who had good relationships with their teachers were recommended for excellent jobs and, with their own efforts, became white-collar professionals in the city, earning their undergraduate degrees in their specialty as well. But she and Xu Cheng, distracted by romance, were often called in by the head teacher. Her mediocre grades, natural fear of authority, and shyness kept her from ever reaching out to her teachers; most of her subject teachers treated her as if she were invisible. Naively, she believed that, since there were no guaranteed job assignments, she would simply find work after graduation. Laziness and blind optimism cost her one opportunity after another. By the time she realized it, her classmates were already settling into new jobs, adapting to new workplaces, while she was left bewildered and alone.